I am who I am!

Forever and ever.

2009-08-06T11:07:00.004+08:00

I miss her.

Ive been trying my very hard too write a tribute of some sorts for her. But i cant get myself to do it. It feels like Id be letting her go.

I'll never do that. Not ever.

What is so special about her, one may ask? To most, she is the best director, film maker, and story teller (mind you, all three ARE different). To many, she is the epitome of kindness, warmth, joy and laughter. To me, she is an angel.

Honestly, I never did like either Sepet, Gubra or Muhsin (though they are not in the lowest part of my list anymore). But I LOVE her commercials. One of the reasons I went into advertising was how she toyed with emotions and the many little idiosyncrasies of life, and I'd like to do that.

One day, my then girlfriend, Hanim Razak, told me that she is in this fan club of Yasmin's, the Storyteller Club or TSC for short. She told me about a screening of Rabun, Yasmin's first movie. Truthfully, I was not jumping out of my seat, then. But I checked out her blog anyways , and put down my name for the screening.

It changed my life.

I fell in love with her kind hearted ways. Instantly.

Why'd I say kind? Well, most of my close friends would have known this story. You see, at the time of the screening, I was working in Spencer Azizul Advertising in Jalan Ipoh. As I live in Shah Alam and I hate to go through the jam, I went to work by KTM Komuter. On the day of the screening, I took off from office, took the LRT to LB. The screening started at around 830-ish, ended around 10pm.

Then, as usual(though I didnt know at that time), while we tried to finish the foods (not too hard, at her insistence and A LOT OF FOOD), all of us in the room chatted away about the movie which somehow went on to Anwar(it was "hari penamaan calon" that night).

After the smokok session, I looked at my watch and ITS 12-FREAKING-30!! MACAMANA AKU NAK BALIK???I panicked, of course.

Then, so shyly I asked..

"Kak Min, where can I take a cab?"

"Cab?You didnt drive meh?"

"No, I took the train, and now dah takde train dah"

"Owh, tak tau la. Maybe at LRT Masjid Jamek.Where do you live?"

"Shah Alam".

To which she said (to my surprise)

"Owh..you can tumpang me then.."

Here I am, just another fan, a miniscule, a microscopic being in her eyes (that was what I thought at that time, she IS A BIG DIRECTOR, okay??) and she just offered me a ride.

I was dumbstruck but managed to nod.

I dont know bout the rest of you, but for me, offering a ride to someone you dont know, that you have just met, especially since in my mind, that she is a celebrity and me being a nobody, is SUPER KIND!

And from then on, I cant stop wanting to be close with her. The smses, the calls, the constant pestering of when-are-we-gonna-lepak-again. I jumped at every chance I get to see her. Every bit of her makes me miss her. Her smile, her off a bit taring, the way she lengkok her body when in mengada mode, her laugh.

Her assalamualaikum.

And I started to love her. Like I love my mum.

Too bad I never told her that.

But I am telling her now.

I love you, mak.

I love you.

Forever and ever, mak.

Forever and ever.

Immortality

2009-07-14T14:51:00.002+08:00

Ever since man has been able to think, plot, lust for power and domination, one of the biggest pursuit is immortality.

Death has always been feared, loathed, even hated. No one, especially in these modern times, embrace it, long for it; and those who does, are frowned upon, called names such as suicidal, terrorist.

So, all the brains of the world try and try again to find a cure for every ailment that ever came. Those who go mortally sick will try every way possible to prolong the inevitable. They seek immortality.

But lo and behold, a select few have achieved it. Though not in the way we would think.

Einstein, Newton, Edison, Graham Bell and all the great thinkers and inventors.

Napoleon, Hitler, Stalin, Chairman Mao and all who changed history.

Elvis, Lennon, Beethoven, and all those who composed.

See any similarity?

DEAD, yet immortal.

And the latest to join them, is my idol, Michael Joseph Jackson (and no, he never converted).

I still believe his innocence, his purity, his sincerity.

RIP MJ, you truly healed the world.

Michael Joseph Jackson, 29 Aug 1958 - 25 June 2009

Everyone knows everyone

2009-05-25T14:40:00.002+08:00

The title has is not in any way related to this here post. Just a thing I'd like to think of things to come.

After the interview at RHB, as I've told them that I used to write a fiction, it generally sparked that part of me again. The writing part.

Hence the two most recent updates to this blog.

I have even start my new fiction, entitled "The End". It is a zombie story. You will find all the gore, stomach churning, disgusting, belching, icky feeling that you might in Resident Evil, and all the other zombie stuff.

With a twist, if I managed to do it.

Read it. Feel for yourself. And dont forget to comment on it.

A fork in the road

2009-05-22T15:07:00.003+08:00

Folks come to this choice at certain point in life. or certain points in life.

I just had one of those points recently. Two to be precise.

You see, I have always had a thing about being in the creative field. Since I was small. I was the kid who would always draw. Anytime. Anywhere.

But everyone, I mean everyone keeps telling me that I have a knack in PR. I can talk. I can make strangers listen to me. Heck, an apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Period. My mom spent 20 years in PR, mass comm. My dad, 40.

So the thing is, before working in Shah Alam, I found myself lucky enough to work in Spencer Azizul, my earliest exposure in advertising. And found out I love it. And now, I got an offer to go work in CD advertising. It's like wishing for a car and getting a Limo.

Then, I got another opportunity. Working in Marcom & product planning. This road lies the opportunity that i wish i could have later in life. The 9-5 job. Stablility. Security. It's like lining up for AirAsia, and end up in first class MAS instead.

Left, lies the road to ultimate creative freedom, Right lies stability for the future.

haih.

But I guess i know which to choose.

On another note.

The other choice involves matters of the heart. But this corkscrew in the ride i call my life is another turn.

Though I hope this turn will finally let me reach the end point. So i can get off this bumpy ride and maybe go to the more slow and steady ride.

A boat ride perhaps.

2008-02-26T12:49:00.002+08:00

salam,

i may not be as frequent a blogger as most out there, and i know for a fact that my blog doesn't have as many hits as many a blog out there, but this is my domain, and i'll shall say what i have in mind.

it's that time again, when we, the people of Malaysia, go out to vote. choose who we want to be our voice in Parliament, to be our representative.

to practise our rights.

but do we have a choice in the first place?

to speak freely, i used to be an avid fan of the ruling body. it may be because of my heighten sense of Malay pride, i chose to support them, to be Red and White, dulu, kini, dan selamanya.

but i guess selamanya doesnt last that long...

not to say that i support those who oppose, albeit it looks otherwise. i do believe that we need more unsupporting voice. i do believe someone should disagree. i do believe that someone should oppose.

that's democracy, isnt it?

but the thing is, who do i choose?

some might say that we have lots of choices.

i say, we dont.

well, maybe we do, but not viable ones.

but i do know this, i will make my stand. im not going.

maybe the next one. lets see how it goes.

but to those who will go, choose wisely. choose those who you trust.

choose those who can work.

those who can make a difference.

time to change.

stand up and be counted

2007-05-10T17:50:00.000+08:00

rights.

i always tell those around me to stand up for their right. make their views heard, and hold their grounds with it.
a few weeks back i had an interesting conversation with a friend of mine. we were, well, actually, i was talking about the right of freedom of speech in Malaysia. it all started with us talking about tinted car windows. then it went to why the f**k the RTD (JPJ) disallowed the rest of us (i.e not VIPs) to tint our car windows. i went on and on about that that should not be a case.

then, my friend said that i'm just sampah (rubbish).

why?

because to him, just saying what you think without anyone hearing it, just dont talk about it.

i disagree.

for me, even if no one hears you out, you should always express your views.even if it's wrong. especially if it's wrong. i mean, how will you know your views are wrong in the first place if there's no one to hear it; let alone correcting it.

and let's just say that your views are right. and you manage to somehow convince your colleagues to agree with you. what then?

yes, there is the huge possibility that none other outside your circle will even hear it.

but huge is NOT absolute, right?

if the general public dont even have the right to have a "politik kedai kopi", what do they have?

all the great politicians started off alone. almost always regarded as a fool or a lunatic. but only in the beginning. the word starts to circulate, expand as more and more heard it, and came to the same conclusion.
that was how UMNO started right?

and from UMNO it became BN, and BN is the government.

and now, who's the one that suppress the general public's views? (though they may say otherwise)

i'm NOT talking politics here. it's not my place to say that. i'm not qualified to say these things.
but dont take my word about the suppression. go and check it yourself.

but still, whether it's suppresed or not, express yourself.

talk.speak.let it be heard.

be yourself.

"for what is a man, what has he got,
if not himself, then he has naught,
to say the things he truly feels,
and not the words of one who kneels."

views..

2007-05-04T09:20:00.000+08:00

just read this and maybe you guys would understand why i always stood my grounds..

“Ideals are like the stars; you will not succeed touching them with your hands. But like the seafaring man on the desert of waters, you choose them as your guides, and by following them you reach your destiny”

i dont know who came up with it but it generally sums up my views.

new life. new leaf.

2007-04-27T12:17:00.000+08:00

the theory of evolution or Darwinism states that the next generation inherits only a portion of the previous generation.
in some religion, it is believed that what we do in this life will effect the outcome of the next. this is what we muslims belief. in other faiths, it is believed that we will be reincarnated in many forms, throughout many lifes, ranging from the lowest caste, to the highest level achievable, the state of nirvana.
now, the saying to turn a new leaf means to start afresh. to start a new chapter. to reboot. usually this will happen when there's an unfortunate turn in life. hence, the new leaf. that's not the case for me though.
for i went through for the past few weeks was an evolution. it was exhilarating to say the least. i thought i was matured enough (though some of my friends would definitely disagree). i must say that i am quite surprised to find that it was quite the opposite (much to my friends amusement, of course!).
i thought i enjoyed my work before, boy, was i wrong! i know this will sound cliche, but i still have the rights to put my 2 cents up front, dont i? the environment in my new workplace surpassed even my imagination; and mind you me, to say that my imagination is borderless is an understatement. the feel-good-vibe and feels-like-family-bond is an experience ive never had the privilege to even dream before. though there are the occasional behind-the-back comments, but its kept under control most of time.definitely more control than most family.
but nobody's perfect, right?
the working hours are hideously out of bounds, the workload really defines the word load, and to say that my journey to the office is a relaxation as i only sit in the train is a direct lie.
but then again, no one gets everything, right?
all in all, i definitely say that this is a good deal.
but that's just a portion of my life.
for the rest of that awfully big portion, i cant even see any similarity.
things have gone downhill, though to tell the truth, i never did see the peak. i have friends all around, but the loneliness is killing me. in a way its my fault i guess. i had so many chances to amend, to repent, to make things right, to make it work. and with so many individuals too. maybe i had my faults too but what is a man, what has he got if not himself? i stood my ground, and i bled.PROFUSELY. but i didnt die. i merely passed out.
and when i woke up, i turned a new leaf.
now, it's a new life. ive evolved.
and i'm taking the first few steps with speed, not recklessness.
for today, i am a new man.

New Works!!(3D)

2006-09-24T16:22:00.000+08:00

My Latest works..

Many things..

2006-09-06T14:52:00.000+08:00

Since i last updated, many things happened in the world, Israel's wave of terror on Lebanon, Thaksin's fake bomb, 22 simultaneous bomb blast in Yala, Lina Joy, IFC, the sale KJ's shares in ECM Libra, the constant denial from him or Pak Lah, the Budget, the (yet again) discount on traffic summons (50% - 70%), death of the Croc Hunter..many things happened..

yet, i stood by, watching...

thinking to what end?

it has been this way since before i was born.

many have tried to lead, and failed, fell to the ground. turning from a dedicated hero to an old man with no power within days, only to wait certain death, either inside the prison, on the chair or even if acquited, dying in the hands of those who was brain washed by Westerners into thinking that they were oppressed by the man who is actually defending them from the real oppressors.

yet, who am i to say?

during the recent war on Lebanon, peaceful or not, gatherings, riots, talks, memorandums have been done, but what did we get out of it?what did the children of Lebanon got out of it? the UN only sent troops after the damage is done..unlike Bosnia..Somalia or any other places that have some or any benificial interest for the REAL powers that be of the world, the EU, US, and UK which all are backed up by the Zionists themselves.

all that transpired more than prove the existance of a massive, powerful organisation which control the world, financially, politically or what ever -ally there is.

so what do we do?

think.

that's what i do.that's what i've been doing. thinking very hard on what we, the powerless majority could do to fight off this huge crime against humanity.

till we finally find the answer, think. that's all we can do besides praying. think, pray and stay united.

otherwise what else can the fool on the hill do?

and the fool on the hill,
sees the sun going down,
and the eyes in his head
see the world spinning round

Busy Bee

2006-08-24T11:27:00.000+08:00

Salam.

Been very VERY busy lately. Since i've been accepted as a full time creative designer at an event management company (Eramaster Resources Sdn Bhd) in Bangi earlier this month, it has been full steam ahead for me. And to tell the truth, i'm also out of steam!!(this month's supply only, i hope!)

First, the very week i came in, i was involved with Tourism M'sia's Travel Fair in Seremban. Say what you want to say, but i was damn proud to see my works' (up to 22' x 33' banner) hanging beside Terminal One! Mind you me, i am not ahweng or An or whoever else that is used to doing big jobs dulu in Melaka.

Then, it was just last week that my company was involved with the Rockstar INXS concert. (That was a Blast!)

This week,all the preparations for Merdeka-related events. The banners, Merdeka Endurance Race, events in UKM and UIA and there's the one (i hope!) involving coming up with a design for Celcom (though i am NOT sure for what, yet).That will be a BIG break for me!! (i'm putting my hopes high for that).

Oh, by the way, though life in Bangi is not as fast-paced asi'd like it to be, i'm starting to call it home.

Home is where the heart is.

P/S: i'm coming up with a more serious issue in the next few entries(i hope!). Damnit! i dont even have time to do the wallpapers...DeviantArt, i miss you!!!

Istiadat Pentauliahan DiRaja Kadet PALAPES IPTA ke 25

2006-06-16T11:49:00.000+08:00

tomorrow is the d-day, the big day. tomorrow, the first batch of ROTU (reserve officer training unit) UiTM Melaka will be commissioned as officers. special kids that lot (not in a retarded way). special place in my heart. why?

i took them in, train them, be in charged of their everything (in army), just the same feeling that a father would have if his sons or daughters excel in life. their like that to me. though the age gap is very close (3 years mostly), the way that i was involved in "bringing them up", made a big impact in my life. safe to say that though 'koleq' gave me an edge in my confidence boost, being the only active Y.O for a while, with vast responsibility and very, very heavy burden, took my confidence level i never knew i could get to.

further enhancing my pride on them is the fact that a Malacca cadet will get the Best Cadet Award (UiTM) out of his squad from all four ROTU UiTM (Shah Alam, Dungun, Arau and Malacca). plus, the Best Academic would also be for a Malacca cadet.

and all this comes from a combination of 'anak angkat', no hq, no support, no facilities, looked down, and trained and taken care of by a Y.O giler/ anak dato' giler..

funny how it all worked out kan?

the only thing i regret about this batch is i couldnt be there for them for all 3 years.

but tomorrow i'll be there, watching every step with pride.

p/s: Istiadat Pentauliahan DiRaja Kadet PALAPES IPTA ke 25 will be at Universiti Malaya. starts around 0700.

Reopening 9/11

2006-06-15T10:36:00.000+08:00

Last night's 'Bulletin Utama' highlighted something. The person Rodriguez claimed to be an ex janitor in WTC and was present the last day WTC would stand, said that all of 9/11 was in fact an elaborated conspiracy plot devised by the administration of George W Bush under the watchful eyes of the Zionist. His statement was backed up by Jimmy Walter, founder of Reopen 9/11 (go to their site here ).

This came as to no surprise to me. I have been at least suspicious of the U.S government since they announce that Al Qaeda was responsible for the attacks. The way I see it, if that said statement was true, why did the campaign against Al Qaeda in Afghanistan ended so quickly? Whereas logically, to crumple the Al Qaeda network, one has to attack it at its heart, its head, Osama Bin Laden. Though the campaign in hunting down Osama, the culprit as U.S put it, failed to locate Osama's whereabouts (even to this very day), the U.S government stopped the search.

This was not the case for Iraq, however.

Bush used 9/11 and Al Qaeda threat to further staged his next strategy, the Weapons of Mass Destruction (WMD). This was used as an excuse to enter Iraq. Even though there were no signs of the said WMD (which was proven as non-existant later), the troops were given strict orders to pursue and capture Saddam, dead or alive.

Bush, of course, had his reasons.

Iraq was against the U.S from the very beginning. Both Bush's wage war against that nation, where the father failed, and the son came out triumphant. Furthermore, Iraq is the only nation in the Middle East that dared to challenge the U.S openly. Saddam, though himself a tyrant, despised U.S government, as most of us now do, for the simplest reason. They treated Muslims all around the world with the utmost distaste.

Plus, Iraq had something they truly want. Oil.

If they were able to gain control of Iraq's oil reserves, they would be holding a majority of the world's oil share. (Bear in mind that they are in control of the Saudi's royal family, and they have already gain some control in Kuwait)

Next in line; Iran. Still using the same excuse, the Bush's government, under direct surveillance of Zionist, is edging to attack Iran within a few months time. Yet, now, they lack the momentum and surprise as they did with Iraq.

This is of course due to the ever growing crowd that oppose him, for many reasons. The lack of care for the troops in Iraq, the lies on the WMD, the undelivered promises, so many 'missed' targets that killed hundreds if not thousands of innocent people and the most recent, the ever growing demands from the public to reopen the 9/11 files.

Even the Americans are waking up.

For those of us who is still asleep, please, wake up. And let us wake the rest up together, Muslims or non Muslims.

Many of us are unable to donate thousands of ringgit for charity. Some of us needs charity. We cannot control the decision made by the government. We can oppose it, and make them amend it, but can never control it.

There's only one way.

Be well educated. VERY. Both street wise or otherwise.

Its up to us to change.

Lately

2006-06-13T14:48:00.000+08:00

It's making headlines almost everyday. Tun's comments on the current admin. So what's all the fuss?

Claiming to be very liquid, the current administrators are now finding themselves in a very hot seat. Being under a microscope and to be scrutinised by the former premier makes the current uneasy.

The claims that they are open to criticism is nothing more than claims. Well, it been that since the beginning. Claiming to forever rid the 'under the table misconducts', plus the fact that the less provocative majority of the crowd has already tired of the former rule, they managed to get the most majority ever.

But through it all, it seems that they are actually not as clear as they claim to be. To say the least, why is it that the comments passed by Tun is considered to be poisonous and very dangerous? Why is it that those calls are said to be made by a deranged old man, who gave up his post unwillingly? With all the responses given, it is becoming very clear that the definition of democracy or freedom of voice holds a very different meaning all together for them than to the general public.

Yes, it is admitted that during the former premier's rule, not much can be said, or even if someone dared to, it will be heavily criticised. But the former did make it clear that criticism is not to be tolerated. Yet, when the current first came into view as the supreme, it was made public that all kinds of opinion are welcomed, be it the positive or not. We can very well see clearly now how thorough.

This is not a fierce attack on the current premier. It is just an opinion, from a very naive, general point of view. This is not to say that the 4th premier was without flaws. He has, time and time again. Yet time and time again he managed to get through it with turning the crowd's attention to something more 'useful', more grandeur, which brought some sort of achievement to Bolehland.

The 4th brought fame and some fortune for us. What does the 5th bring?

The general public would REALLY like to see it, the sooner the better.

But nevertheless, the general public do support the admin. Just make sure the admin too supports the public.

i love this song!!

2006-06-08T10:20:00.000+08:00

yeah it's d oldies..so what?i've been in love with dis song since d first time i heard in..masa i was 7 ke 8 yrs old..

My Way by Frank Sinatra

And now, the end is near;
And so I face the final curtain.
My friend, Ill say it clear,
Ill state my case, of which Im certain.

Ive lived a life thats full.
Ive traveled each and evry highway;
And more, much more than this,
I did it my way.

Regrets, Ive had a few;
But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption.

I planned each charted course;
Each careful step along the byway,
But more, much more than this,
I did it my way.

Yes, there were times, Im sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
I ate it up and spit it out.
I faced it all and I stood tall;
And did it my way.

Ive loved, Ive laughed and cried.
Ive had my fill; my share of losing.
And now, as tears subside,
I find it all so amusing.

To think I did all that;
And may I say - not in a shy way,
No, oh no not me,
I did it my way.

For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught.
To say the things he truly feels;
And not the words of one who kneels.
The record shows I took the blows -
And did it my way!

666

2006-06-06T16:25:00.000+08:00

today's the 6th june 2006. 666. the devil's number. the number of the beast. what's the fuss?

they say that 666 is evil, some even say it has something to do with illuminati (google illuminati - 666), the organisation that is responsible for every world war wether it's numbered or not ( refer to Vietnam, Iraq, Afghanistan, and Bosnia). they are also called the 'international bankers', in control of the UN, with resources from the Swiss Bank and the IMF. this group of people are long time considered to be jewish, yet the illuminati are just using various religions as their 'Pawns' in a game of international 'Chess' against the whole world. their aim? to gain total control of the world, be it economically, administration or even religion. this group is actually the children of the devil, doing his bidding in the world.

this is what i had gathered from various books (e.g: "Pawns in the Game", Red Fog Over America"). but there's one thing that caught my eye..

when i googled 666 + quran + gematrical, i came across something way more powerful than 666, it is the number 19.

just go the this link and read more http://www.universalunity.org/2.html

Subhanallah.

makes you think..REALLY think.

latest wallpapers

2006-06-06T15:46:00.000+08:00

here are two more wallpapers..

bdw,thanx for the comments, aprc8 it!just keep em comin!

That Song

2006-06-05T15:06:00.000+08:00

"So Sick"

Mmmm mmm yeah
Do do do do do do do-do
Ohh Yeah

Gotta change my answering machine
Now that I'm alone
Cuz right now it says that we
Can't come to the phone
And I know it makes no sense
Cuz you walked out the door
But it's the only way I hear your voice anymore
(it's ridiculous)
It's been months
And for some reason I just
(can't get over us)
And I'm stronger than this
(enough is enough)
No more walkin round
With my head down
I'm so over being blue
Cryin over you

And I'm so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can't I turn off the radio?

Gotta fix that calender I have
That's marked July 15th
Because since there's no more you
There's no more anniversary
I'm so fed up with my thoughts of you
And your memory
And how every song reminds me
Of what used to be

That's the reason I'm so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can't I turn off the radio?

(Leave me alone)
Leave me alone
(Stupid love songs)
Dont make me think about her smile
Or having my first child
I'm letting go
Turning off the radio

Cuz I'm so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing she was still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can't I turn off the radio?
(why can't I turn off the radio?)

Said I'm so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing she was still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why can't I turn off the radio?
(why can't I turn off the radio?)

And I'm so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishin' you were still here
Said I'm so sick of love songs so sad and slow
Why can't I turn off the radio?
(why can't I turn off the radio?)
Why can't I turn off the radio?

Conspiracy

2006-06-05T11:01:00.000+08:00

Lately, i have been reading up all things related to hidden conspiracy..i used to be a devoted believer, not caring wether the info is true or not.

now, i av changed.

i believe,knowing that i did my research.knowing that though it may be fabricated, stretched way before the line we can comprehend, there's some truth in it.

there is a conspiracy.there are conspiracies.worldwide.nationwide.

the biggest of em all, i must say is the conspiracy of the international bankers,the illuminati. read bout it in numerous books..but i find it most interesting in "Pawns in the Game". cant remember the author though.

then of course there's the Da Vinci code. just do a little research and you will know that there's truth in there. with some research, you'll know what to look out for.

even in our country, it exist.tho maybe the intentions are not as devious as those internationally, there is at one point exist a threat to the so-called stability and prosperity of our nation. even if they are just a facade made up by the government, we as the people of this nation, have to at least be cautious. there's even a link on this blog if in any case you guys may want to check it out. khairy chronicles. bear in mind to keep a VERY open mind. dont take in everything that's on the site. by doing that, with BOTH side of the argument (be it pro or anti govt), it's up to us to weigh the situation and come up with our own conclusion, our own understanding of it.

that's politics.

"politics is as clean as changing diapers. just know what to throw away, what to wash and keep. but it will always be messy and it will always stink"

bored

2006-05-30T11:20:00.000+08:00

above are some i-did-it-just-to-fill-the-time punyer desktop wallpapers i designed out of boredom...kalau nak comment..do so...nak amik then save (which i doubt) pun takpe..enjoy...

it's been one week

2006-02-27T12:24:00.000+08:00

my granma passed away last week..on saturday, 18th february 2006. she was 86.

before dis, if anyone that i know died, i didnt shed even a tear. but she was different. she took care of me for few years when i was little. only two of us. me n my cousin, Tariq. sadly enough, both of us weren't there when it happened. Tariq, a pilot in dubai, couldnt come home, whilst i was in Perak. if i had gone there by car, i cud have came back. i wud have. but alas, it was a course trip and we were not going to go through KL. so, i missed it. the only chance to see her before they put her in eternal darkness. and come to think of it, none of her favourites but one was there. sad for me, sad for us, sad for her.

but what to do? que sera, sera.

8 Simple Rules

2006-02-03T19:39:00.000+08:00

The rules are as follow :-
1. The tagged victim has to come up with 8 different points of their perfect lover.
2. Need to mention the sex of the target.
3. Tag 8 victims to join this game n leave a comment on their comments saying they've been tagged.
4. If tagged the 2nd time, there's no need to post again.

Here it is..

1. She is wise.
Well, intelligent and wise.I dont even care if she's smarter than me.Most of the time,NOT ALL the time.(dats pushing it kan?)

2. She is a fighter.
She stands up for her rights.Knows when to be Xena, yet knows when to be the damsel in distress,waiting for her knight in shining armour.

3. She is traditional, yet exceptional
Comprende?She is traditional in every way, her walk,her talk, anything and everything.Yet..once a while,once in a blue moon,I'd love her to be daring..maybe a menage a trois,perhaps?lol...

4. She is beautiful..both inside and out
Need i explain more?

5. She understands my joke and can stand it
Well,lets face it,my jokes are sometimes very sharp, and painful..to some..and other times are very difficult to comprehend let alone understand.

6. She is a lady
all the stuff women demand that they want a gentleman makes them forget something, you must be a lady for you to meet a gentleman. and nowadays, a man cant be gentle all the time..its bad for your health!!

7. She is practical
Knows when to be very ladylike yet knows when to be independent.Nuff sed!

8. She loves me for who I am
Not for who I can be or supposed to be..I cant be a pretender..and if she loves me for who i pretend to be, then she doesnt really loves me,and that means, we are not meant to be..

Heavy huh? yeah...I need to lie down..

bdw...nak tag sapa?who else read dis?

2005-10-01T20:45:00.000+08:00

"Bila lelaki benar2 jatuh cinta dan setia pada kekasihnya dgn khlas, perubahan sikapnya amat mengejutkan.
Hati lelaki yang dianggap keras selama ini, tiba2 secara semulajadi menjadi selembut kapas apabila sudah jatuh cinta dgn relanya. Bahkan lelaki yg mabuk cinta sanggup berkorban dan buat apa sahaja utk kekasihnya.Sekeras manapun hati lelaki ia akan mengalirkan air mata apabila hatinya dilukai. Utk melihat lelaki menangis amatlah payah.
Diantara tanda2 lelaki yg jatuh cinta dgn hebat ialah:
* Dia bersungguh2 melakukan sesuatu utk kekasihnya dgn rela bukan krn terpaksa.
* Dia sentiasa ingin menghiburkan kekasihnya dan berubah menjadi orang yg kuat bercakap.
* Dia byk menasihati kekasihnya kerana dia amat menyayangi kekasihnya.
* Dia berusaha mengongkong kebebasan kekasihnya krn perasaan cemburunya yg meluap2.
* Dia sentiasa takut kehilangan kekasihnya.
* Dia sentiasa mengawasi pergerakan kekasihnya krn dia sentiasa berasa curiga.* Dia tidak suka ada lelaki lain rapat dgnkekasihnya.
* Dia mudah merasa cemburu dan sensitif apabila kekasihnya tidak menumpukan sepenuh perhatian kepadanya.
* Adakalanya dia seperti seorang anak kecil yang meminta perhatian krn dia mahu kekasihnyamelayannya lebih dari org lain.
* Dia menjadi org yg paling rajin dan sanggup membantu kekasihnya melakukan apa saja.
* Dia pandai merajuk hati krn ingin dipujuk oleh kekasihnya.
* Dia akan mengalabah apabila kekasihnya berjauhan daripadanya terlalu lama.
* Dia sentiasa mempastikan keselamatan kekasihnya.
* Dia mementingkan kekasihnya daripada dirinya sendiri.
* Dia kerap bertanya adakah kekasihnya mencintainya krn dia merasa kasihnya lebih kuat drpd kekasihnya.
* Dia tidak akan melayan perempuan lain yg tidak ada urusan penting dengannya.
* Dia cuba meluangkan lebih byk masa dgn kekasihnya walaupun terpaksa menunggu kekasihnya dgn sabar.
* Dia membanggakan kekasihnya di depan org lain.
* Kalau ditinggalkan oleh kekasihnya, ia akan berasa serik dan tidak percaya dgn cinta perempuan lain namun dia sentiasa mengharap kekasihnya kembali kepadanya.
* Apabila timbul org ketiga, dia akan hilang akal dan sanggup berbuat apa saja untuk merebut kembali kekasihnya.
* Dia menganggap kekasihnya sebagai org yg paling dipercayainya dan sanggup menyerahkan harta walaupun nyawanya sendiri.
* Dia tidak akan berlaku curang kepada kekasihnya namun jikalau dia berbuat demikian itu bererti hatinya belum 100 peratus mencintai kekasihnya.
* Bukan semua lelaki sanggup menitiskan airmata hanya untuk seorang perempuan.

HARGAILAH PENGORBANAN INSAN BERNAMA LELAKI

(does this concerns me?)

2005-09-23T11:08:00.000+08:00

10 YEARS AGO I:
1. Was a member of the Eton of the East,the place for the creme de la creme..go figure!
2. Was in the best brotherhood ever....i miss em...RaYBeLLiouSe
3. Did well for my exams...but was still disappointed

FIVE YEARS AGO I:
1. Studied Computer Science and dont ask me what happened
2. Laid my eyes on the love of my life but she settled for someone else....huu!
3. Joined my service and unlike Naya,the 1st year wasn't tons of fun

TWO YEARS AGO I:
1. Commisioned as an officer
2. Made a BIG stand and hence the biggest turn of my life
3. Had the BIGGEST responsibility ever and it made my management skills as they are today

ONE YEAR AGO I:
1. The love of my life finally mine!
2. My love for my service increased exponentially
3. Made up my mind to give my soul to the country

YESTERDAY I:
1. Had a presentation
2. Prepared for today's review
3. Had lack-of-sleep-finishing-work syndrome

TODAY I:
1. Sent my works for review
2. Came to Adi's CC
3. Finally updated my overdued blog

TOMORROW I WILL:
1. Hope to be in Shah Alam with my girl
2. Spoil her more
3. Find time to finish up more of my work

THREE SNACKS I ENJOY:
1. Mentos
2. Anything chocolate (especially Ferrero Roche)
3. Cempedak Goreng

THREE THINGS I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT:
1. My car
2. My gadgets (PC, Handphone,etc)
3. My Girl

THREE THINGS I COULD BUY WITH $1,000:($1,000 tak cukup for all these..)
1. A Good Sound system for my car
2. Another iguana
3. Things to spoil her more

THREE BAD HABITS I HAVE:
1. Not wearing my glasses (same here dear!)
2. Lack of sleep
3. Rage

THREE THINGS I WOULD NEVER WEAR:
1. A mini skirt (with OR without thigh high boots!giler BURUK if I were to wear them kan?ahax!)
2. Men's G-strings!
3. BIG glasses!

THREE SHOWS I LIKE:
1. X-Files (with David Duchovny NOT the other guy I couldnt even bother to remember his name)
2. CSI
3. Simpsons

THREE PLACES I'VE LIVED:
1. Taman Melawati
2. Section 18
3. Section 7

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Skodeng
2. Jaie
3. B

THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. Hate to admit it,but I AM GOOD on the dance floor!
2. I'm persistent
3. I'm a smooth talker

THREE THINGS YOU DISLIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. My rage
2. I forget(which always ticks off Naya)
3. I dont know what I want as a present(which also always ticks off Naya)

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. Losing Naya
2. Being without ideas like I am right now
3. herm....what else?!

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Handphone
2. Car
3. Something that I know I SHOULD stop but it's just so hard!!

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. A shirt
2. A black slack
3. A black socks

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE BANDS/MUSICAL ARTISTS:
1. Everyone under Dr Dre
2. Butterfingers
3. Ruffedge and their twins; V.E

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
1. Akon - Belly Dancer
2. Will Smith - Party Starter
3. Green Day - Wake Me Up When September Ends

THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
1. Be a Full Lieutenant (at least) or maybe a Captain
2. Throw away my rage, not lose it
3. Upgrade my gadgets

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE (in no particular order):
1. I love iguanas
2. I have a Mini Cooper
3. I want a Mini Cooper

THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
1. Outdoor sports
2. Be good in shopping (though I try,honest!)
3. I cant seem to remember how I could play the drums, I'm way off beat now...damn....

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. Sleep
2. Be in Shah Alam tomorrow
3. Drive a Diablo

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
1. Army
2. Designer
3. Graphic Consultant (hey,people say my ideas are good but my work are not AS good)

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Japan
2. Hawaii
3. Danau Toba

waahhhh!!so long aaa!

2005-05-24T15:21:00.000+08:00

pergh!lama seh x blog!!i m too damn busy!!

1st it was the exams..tho it's not too tough!but da assignments...pergh!!tercabut kapla!!i didnt even av time to sleep!!tensen maaa!!!

then dah abis tu ingat holiday...cet!!holiday habis!!!this year the istiadat pentauliahan kadet PALAPES IPTA was held at UiTM Shah Alam...so...damn sibuk..banyak giler workload...all d 2nd lt kna report tu various department...n i was attached to mende paling i hate...JEMPUTAN!!!!pergh...!!!n i was made the in charge lak tu...sleepless nites lagi...n then all the comments...dahla kja jenis start at 9am till 3pm d NEXT DAY but still ader org kata kja x commitment!!mcm bangsat!!

so now im finally free...but coz dah lama x blogging... so lembab sket aaa..so bear w me!!!

a good song

2005-04-05T21:11:00.000+08:00

Artis : Ruffedge
Lagu : Bila Rindu

Positive Tone

dikeheningan malam,
termenungku berseorang
tak lena mata dipejam
terdengar suara terngiang
suara merdu yg di sayang
bagai kau didepan mata
ku capai tapi tak kenal
sukarnya memendam rasa
ingin ku luahkan kata

bila rindu,terkenang mu siang terasa sayu
syahdunya jiwaku bila malam,
makin kelam
jauh terbang diriku melayang
aku rindu,sentuhan mu ku rasa sayu
inginkan jiwamu selubungi,jiwa ini,
bawa ku dlm pelangi
melepasi segala hati ini

jauh angan ku lena,ku rasa kita bersama,
kau bawaku ke sana
ke alam kisah yg lama,kenangan di dlm jiwa..
bila tersedar semula,disisiku kau tiada
sukarnya ku pendam rasa,
ingin ku luahkan semua ooooouuu

bila rindu,terkenang mu siang terasa sayu
syahdunya jiwaku bila malam,makin kelam
jauh terbang diriku melayang
aku rindu,sentuhan mu ku terasa sayu
inginkan jiwamu selubungi,jiwa ini,
bawa ku dlm pelangi
melepasi segala hati ini

sesunguhnya kita mestilah
wujudkan sefahaman dan hormatmu
hormati,ikhlas,kasih,
-------------------
makin tak ada,bertemu semula

awan yg mencas semesta
menyampaikan pesan kesunyian kanda sendiri
kesepian yg menyelubungi hari hari ku
disajikan doa2 ku kerana rindu
yg menanti kau dtg dan pergi seperti mimpi2 ku,
fantasiku,
bukan dongeng lagi sayup kedengaran
disisi cuping,disetiap corong,lorong,yg lohong
benar!ku tak bohong,bila hati menyanyi..

bila rindu,terkenang mu siang terasa sayu
syahdunya jiwaku bila malam,makin kelam
ooohhohhoo
aku merindu,sentuhan mu ku rasa sayu
inginkan jiwa selubungi,
jiwa ini,bawa ku dlm pelangi
melepasi batas

oh bila rindu,terkenang mu sayang.,
ku terasa sayu
syahdunya jiwaku bila malam,makin kelam
jauh terbang diriku melayang
aku rindu,sentuhan mu ku rasa sayu
(ku rindukan sentuhanmu)
inginkan jiwamu selubungi,
jiwa ini,bawa ku dlm pelangi
melepasi batas diri ini

2005-03-22T12:21:00.000+08:00

Lonely No More

Now it seems to me

That you know just what to say

Words are only words

Can you show me something else

Can you swear to me that you'll always be this way

Show me how you feel

More than ever baby

[Chorus:]

I dont wanna be lonely no more

I dont wanna have to pay for this

I dont want to know the lover at my door

Just another heartache on my list

I dont wanna be angry no more

You're the one who could never stand for this

So when you tell me that you love me no for sure

I dont want to be lonely anymore

Now its hard for me with my heart still on the mend

Open up to me like you do your girlfriends

And you sing to me and it's harmony

Girl, what you do to me is everything

Make me say anything;

just to get you back again

Why can we just try

[Chorus:]

I dont wanna be lonely no more

I dont wanna have to pay for this

I dont want to know the lover at my door

Just another heartache on my list

I dont wanna be angry no more

You're the one who could never stand for this

So when you tell me that you love me no for sure

I dont want to be lonely anymore

What if I was good to you, what if you were good to me

What if I could hold you till I feel you move inside of me

What if it was paradise, what if we were symphonies

What if I gave all my life to find some way to stand beside you

[Chorus:]

I dont wanna be lonely no more

I dont wanna have to pay for this

I dont want to know the lover at my door

Just another heartache on my list

I dont wanna be angry no more

You're the one who could never stand for this

So when you tell me that you love me no for sure

I dont want to be lonely anymore

exam is heree!!

2005-03-20T16:35:00.000+08:00

g luck to y'all sitting 4 exam...i kno i NEED em,lotsa o em!!

hermmmm......very funny...

2005-02-24T10:45:00.000+08:00

funny how u will meet ppl on d net..juz now i was on msgr,n an old fren o mine tetibe lyn borak..then..juz now i saw a name...DER or sumthin like dat on my tagboard...sapa ni?but besides dat...its nice 2 know ppl on d net,kan?

nway,my dad finally showed me his true 'speret koleq'(dats how we-the mckkians- used 2 say it)..yesterday,4 d 1st time i think i saw him wearing d old boys tie to work...F.Y.I,wednesdays r MCKK's corp day..then, last nite he came 2 me n we juz talk n talk bout MC days...its good 2 share d same school w ur dad...especially if its d place for the creme de la creme of our great nation...

oh kolej melayu,harapan bangsaku.....

aaahhh...the good old days...

to my comrades in MCKK class of 99,i miss u guys!!

Dis is Prove!!

2005-02-12T22:32:00.000+08:00

bukan nak bongkak but tgk sendri aa kan??

Which Naruto Character are You?
Test by http://www.naruto-kun.com

Courtesy Campaign

2005-02-11T16:27:00.000+08:00

by now,i think most o us av alrdy seen d add in which a Malay guy refused 2 get up n gv d seat up 4 an old lady,a pregnant woman AND a blind,OLD man!few things dat i noticed tho'...
1st,d bad guy is a MALAY...n this in a way is a cruel parody,irony,n all d other -ny dat us,d MALAYS,d aborigines o Tanah Melayu,d one dats supposed 2 b d race dat is d most courteous,DONT!wake up guys!@ da rate we r goin,none o our future kids wud even say thanks..2 anyone!(wait a minute..hav u ever?)
2nd,he's young.he's d future generation(need i say more?)
3rd,HE THINKS HE'S RIGHT!just look at his face!
d point here is,dat d ad showed d true side of most o us,and it aint pretty..think about it,ait?
oh,i almost forgot bout handphones..d problem all o us face since it was made into mass production n became cheaper than a kilo of dried kembong.people,in short,lost their manners as a payment for all d advances in technology and modernisations.aiya....so sad...no wonder the Man upstairs is thinking bout ending it all..

change before it's to late,y'all....

PoLiTicS iS DeFiNiTeLy NOT 4 Me!!

2005-02-10T19:36:00.000+08:00

CooL PiX HuH?Very PoliTiKUS!!AHAX!nwayz,ive been thinkin bout d shits dey called POLITICS..d reason i call em shits?COZ THEY ARE!!n i'm not even talkin bout d nation's politics,i'm talkin bout U's(or IPT's).dere exist a 'coalition' called d MPP(Majlis Perwakilan PELAJAR) in UiTM..but sadly,dey do NOTHING for d students!xcept 4 begging 4 our votes!i mean,they shud make a stand 4 d students NOT against em,rite?evrything in UiTM seems 2 b d other way round..n i'm not talkin bout MLK only..but d virus seems 2 affect ALL UiTM it seems..y cant ours b juz like UMs or UPMs?*sigh*

4 instance,parking.yeah,yeah..in UM n UPM most o d students walk 2 class..but ave u been dere?it's a pedestrians haven!paved walkways w xtra roof 2 spice it up,add a pinch of zebra crossings and a grain o MANNERS!!dats y!!UiTM?try walkin dere n u'll either die of excessive Vitamin-D's or get hit by d F1-drivers-turned-UiTM-bus-Drivers!

maybe they'd say use d bus then..rite...the management promised 2 polish up d bus service n make it run evry 10 to 15 minutes..but hey,guess what?u can only c a bus actually stopping afta DOUBLE d time!n dats in S.Alam.i guess in MLK its ok cos its not to big a campus.

but dere's anuda thing bout MLK..1.students who don't av d privilige of stayin in college can bring their car 2 class,provided dat dey park it at d college!!stupid?
2.(not confirmed)starting next semester,all students MUST ONLY wear slacks 2 class.IS THIS A UNIVERSITY OR A BOARDING SCHOOL?3.d guards n staffs ere r ridiculuos beyond wat d mind cud comprehend.once a fren o mine was holding a wine glass n a can o Coke,happily walking 2wards d car 2 go 2 s alam w me 2 shoot an advert.he was stopped by a guard and was given a fine for "DRINKING ALCOHOL"!plus,his thumbdrive was taken,d guard said dat he belived it contained porn!!how Shitty can sum 1 get huh?

then dere's d stuff w d world's politics like d truce between Israel n Palestine..will it last or is it just anuda facade?WE cud only hope,huh?

Introducing!!!

2005-02-07T22:56:00.000+08:00

tis is my 1st entry and God knows i've NO idea watsoeva for wat 2 write!!

nwayz, i am Glad dat in a way,ALL d problems with Naya has tone down to basically none;
thanx to d fact dat i've finally realized how precious she is to me, even tried 2 b a fren 2 shah...and Naya goin mo n mo 2wards d 'not-liking' side 4 shah!(lucky me!bad huh?)

next,is a mo heavy stuff.d tsunami...yeah,yeah...mayb its a bit 2 l8,ait?but dun blame me,k?i juz startd d blog!it got me thinkin...mayb it's time 4 us,humans,muslims, to change..b a better person..do d basic things...like PRAYING!ive got a fren who jokingly admittd dat he last had his Friday Prayers....5 YEARS AGO!!man!come 2 think of it,we d muslims esp malays,had alwiz look down,in a way,2 people w any other religion...jews 4 instance...yeah,in Quran it's stated dat they r our ultimate enemy...but juz look @ em,they pray!they hold 2 wat they believe so dear,so close!made me think bout d sayin: holds ur frens close,ur enemies CLOSER...maybe it's time we shud think bout wats precious 2 us,n dats our belief,our religion,especially when we say IT STILL IS!think about it!

dats it 4 my 1st entry!